Tuesday 25 November 2014

Why I switch the TV off.

If I ruled the TV world I would ban all quiz shows. I have no idea what relevance they contribute to society, apart from a headache. Another one crossed off my list would be Jeremy Kyle, as I really don't need to know why a broken toothed chap in a track suit has slept with his girlfriends sister. Only recently did I purchase a TV for my living room, and even now I barely watch it. Just a few weeks ago, it occurred to me that the only time you know when you're watching compelling TV, is when you have to resist the urge of emptying your bladder. Believe me, if you're making several trips to the toilet when your favourite programme is on, you're either drinking too much or it's time to switch over. The only two real ingredients to great TV is humour and aggression - that's why Jeremy Kyle is popular. However, Jeremy Kyle isn't able to provide anything educational to its audience. If I wanted to watch something a bit more educational than Jeremy Kyle, I would hang out in a ghetto part of London, where I would be able to watch an episode like that in real life. When we watch TV we want to see extremes: it either fascinates you because you cannot relate to it at all, or, you can relate to it immensely and laugh out loud. That's why there is a lot of rubbish on our screens. Children are exposed to a lot of television from a young age, and if the government wants to see a decrease in crime committed by adolescent youths, and an increase in young people wanting to learn more about the the world, they need to ensure that production companies are making television which adds to our future generations' educational needs. From most of my unfortunate observations, the only time I will watch TV is if it teaches me something, if it is highly entertaining and if it adds some tension. And if it doesn't have all three, I tend to switch the box off.

Thursday 13 November 2014

The power of lipstick, short skirts and high heels

The you, the real you, underneath the facade of make-up, is always ready to show its face, but sometimes it is just not appropriate. Take a moment to think how you behave when you meet a stranger. First impressions count; look the part and you may gain a sale, a new friend, or an enemy. It's not a comfortable subject, trying to look good, making an effort - it all sounds so superficial. But there is a hidden meaning under the film of foundation and lashings of lipstick. It hides a multitude of sins and it shows you have respect for yourself. Catch the sight of a smartly dressed person and it evokes many different feelings, such as admiration, hope and even luck. Conversely, when the opposite occurs, disappointment beckons. We are all subconsciously attracted to people who make an effort with their appearance, in business, in relationships and in a coffee shop. It reflects this person's diligence, self-confidence and determination, in so many other areas of their life. Take a short shirt. It may attract the wrong sort of attention if you hitch it up too high, but have it at the right length and you will gain respect - particularly if you don't have saggy knees. Pair the skirt with high heels, and you can class yourself as Gods gift to everyone.

Wednesday 12 November 2014

Equality will never exist.

In a supposed world of equality, we clearly do not live in one. Men still earn more than women: in general female bosses earn 35% less than male colleagues, and even after 4 decades after the 'Equal Pay Act' male company directors take home £21,000 a year more than female counterparts. 40% of managers avoid hiring younger women to get around maternity leave. On a positive note, even though there are 10 times as many stay at home dads than a decade ago, still only 1 in 7 fathers are now the main childcare provider. So what does this tell you about the so-called Equal Pay Act of 1970? I think if we're moving forwards in the way of equality, i.e. treating women and men the same in terms of pay and working conditions, then this Act needs a re-write - particularly since we live in a country where some individuals love to harp on about equality. It's all talk and no action in this world of politics, and this has been going on for more than 40 years! One of my arguments as to why we should not fight for equality is this: there is a scientific fact which states why men will always be the more dominant sex in the workforce: men are generally better leaders as they have higher levels of testosterone. It has nothing to do with sleeping your way to the top, but it is very closely linked. People fail time and time again to grasp a blatantly obvious fact when it comes down to the lack of equality in society, so let me enlighten you, if you weren't already aware. On average, in adult males, levels of testosterone are about 7-8 times as great as in adult females, and the reason hormones are relevant to leadership is that testosterone has a buffering effect on cortisol. In other words, testosterone neutralises anxiety, cognitive dissonance and fear, that comes with the fight or flight response, which in turn increases men's level of confidence, enables them to deal with intense pressure and it generally makes them more ambitious than women. That's why men find it easier to ask for a pay-rise. Look at the arguably biggest businessmen and influencers of the 20th century: Bill Gates, Richard Branson, Donald Trump, Mark Zuckerburg, Warren Buffett and Lord Sugar, to name but a few. Arguably, there have been some extremely influential women in the 20th century, but let's face it, so far, there has never been a sharp correlation between male and female leadership. The late Margaret Thatcher was the longest serving Prime Minister of all time, and she was the only woman in the whole of history, to have held the office in our country. That tells us that although she was exceptional at what she did, there are very few women out there who can biologically deal with pressures such as running a county. As Robbins mentioned in 2008, the general characteristics of charismatic leaders include self confidence, strong vision, the ability to articulate the vision and the willingness to make radical changes. I strongly agree with this statement and both genders can relate to it. However, I feel men and women do not need to compete, and cannot compete against the opposite sex. We are biologically different for a fundamental reason. Someone please help me answer this question: why is it that there is a gender divide at the Olympic Games? If we were all equal surely they would have mixed teams? Let's be totally frank, if mixed teams were suddenly enforced it would cause a global outrage: "How on earth can this be fair - men are stronger, faster, and are much more likely to beat the women!" ("Well of course,"one would argue, "that would be the testosterone kicking in.") It's a wonderful concept to strive towards equality in the workplace and I wish those fighting for it the best of luck. However, unfortunately, equality is a fantasy, it's a juxtaposition and Mother Nature simply won't allow it. So let the strong women be stronger women and the strong men be stronger men.

Friday 6 April 2012

Timeless hypnotherapy

Timeless designs are really wonderful things. However incongruous the surroundings may be, a timeless piece of furniture can exist perpetually, throughout the ages, and look even  better as decades glide by. A timeless watch can look utterly magnificent and can therefore be worn over many generations.But as the word ‘timeless’ might suggest, how about a watch which really does stop in time? Or, how about leaving your watch at home altogether?

I always have to be somewhere on time, and I actually quite like it. I get up on time, I go to work on time.  And I do my best to leave on time. (Even though on some days, it’s not always possible!)  In actual fact, I think I am getting to know the time so well these days, I only have to look at the sky and work out where the sun is! (Although admittedly,  in London, I do struggle to find the sun most days!)

I think the only time, when I didn’t think about the time, was the time I was a child and my only concept of time was when I was travelling in the car (several times!) with my parents.  I would cry: "Mum! Dad! Are we nearly there yet?" A familiar phase with you, I am sure. But do you remember how wonderfully free you felt as a child?  The great thing about children is that they throw themselves into whatever they do, losing hours in painting or studying insects in a patch of grass. Having no responsibilities means that children have the space in their minds to let their imagination really bloom. It’s only over time, as adults, we realise that time is money and money is time.

But is it really?

We spend time in different ways, in non-monetary pursuits, like spending time with family and friends. But equally, we spend our time working for the physical and also emotional requirements of our existence. So time isn’t really just money – it is about enjoying precious moments with loved ones and also time alone.

Have you ever thought about an event in the future, only when you actually get there, you start thinking about another future event which hasn't even happened yet? The concept of time has its way of slipping into our daily routines, sometimes without us even realising it, which means our grasp of enjoying the present moment almost slips through our fingers.

If you are having trouble with past issues, or you worry about the future, hypnotherapy can actually rebalance the thoughts in the deepest part of your mind so you can start to enjoy the precious and wonderful moments every single day has to offer. And  going back to my 'timeless watch' analogy: perhaps in some situations, it's best to leave that watch at home after all.

www.sarahdales.co.uk

Sunday 1 April 2012

Self love

Your subconscious mind does not differentiate between how you perceive yourself, and how you perceive  others. For example, your judgement which may go along the lines that "you are good" and that "the person out there is bad" is simply that "if you were to do what the other person is doing, you'd consider yourself bad." Another example of this would be if you are upset with another person your subconscious mind registers this upset as if it were "with yourself" and activates the release of appropriate poisonous chemicals into your own bloodstream. Ultimately thinking lovely and beautiful thoughts for others has nothing to do with wanting to act saintly, it has everything to do with "self-love" and taking care of yourself.

Saturday 3 December 2011

I will make you slim!

With Christmas looming upon us I thought it would be rather festive to write about something that's very dear to many people's hearts: food. Not only is food an essential part to our survival, but we are so lucky to have many varieties to choose from. Most of us can categorize ourselves into one of the two sorts: you either eat to live, or live to eat. If you can associate yourself with the latter type you may experience some of the problems I am going to talk about. I class people who overeat into three types: you are either the boredom eater, the emotional eater or the binge eater. Then you do get the occasional one or two who claim that they aren't any of these types, and that they just like the sensation of food in their mouth. Now, although I can understand how one can enjoy the sensation of say, chocolate in their mouth, there is a big difference between enjoying the taste of chocolate to demolishing a whole 250g Cadbury's Dairy Milk in one sitting, and consequently feeling a tremendous amount of guilt afterwards. You probably end up questioning yourself: "Why did I have to eat all of that? How greedy of me. Now I feel sick and I can't move, all because I love the taste of chocolate!"
Familiar feeling? I thought so. Well, just to let you know, you are not alone. In fact, chocolate 'addiction' is very common. And overeating anything in general is also, very common.
The reason many people suffer with their weight is because they become 'addicted' to certain foods. But it's not only the food itself they are 'addicted' to, it's also the feelings associated with that particular type of food that they become 'addicted' to. Overeating can therefore turn into a bad habit and it's very difficult to break that cycle because your subconsious mind has been programmed to overeat. How many times for example,have you consciously wanted to stop eating in excess, but still continue to bolt food down your mouth? That's your subconscious mind at work; once its taken on board a habit, it's very difficult to consciously break.
If you are overweight, you have probably struggled with your weight all your life. You have probably tried every diet going and failed miserably, everytime. Because the fact of the matter is, you know as well as I do that diets simply don't work!
So, where are we going with all of this? Well, as I mentioned earlier your subconscious mind has been PROGRAMMED by way of HABIT. You have become addicted to food because you have reinforced a habit of overeating so many times that your subconscious mind has accepted that overeating is a necessity to your being. Your subconscious mind has no idea what is a good or bad habit. So when you reinforce something over and over your subconscious mind assumes that's what you want and it's going to stick!
So, what is needed here is something that can bypass the subconscious mind, to reprogram old, negative beliefs about food and to get your subconscious mind to start agreeing with your conscious mind. And that very special, almost magical tool, is hypnotherapy. If you want to lose weight and you are ready to stop overeating once and for all, you should almost certainly get in touch.

I will make you slim!

www.sarahdales.co.uk
info@sarahdales.co.uk
https://www.facebook.com/pages/S-M-Dales-Hypnotherapy-Centre/143365342419724

Tuesday 18 October 2011

Confidence

We are all born with confidence. Children are naturally confident, self-expressive and curious. A child will playfully pull a cat's tail or loudly ask questions without fear of judgement in public places. Children will run around like wild animals in the supermarket causing their parents havoc without a care in the world! Children have bountiful amounts of confidence for they were born with it.

From the first time a child becomes conscious up until the age of around six years old, they absorb influences and suggestions into their subconsious mind like a sponge, and this establishes their self esteem and habits. For example if a mother runs away from a spider, screaming in front of her child, the child will learn that behaviour and accept that a spider is something to be fearful of. Equally if someone tells a child it cannot sing, for example, they will accept that as a fact, without question.

From about the age of six years old children develop what hypnotherapists call a 'critical faculty'- this is the 'gatekeeper', if you like, which decides which conscious decisions are going to be accepted in the subconscious mind.

Unfortunately the 'gatekeeper' does not do a very good job at keeping the negative influences and suggestions out of the subconscious mind, which means knocks and setbacks in life have a detrimental effect on confidence levels. People judge, criticise and comdemn which can sometimes result in people losing their confidence all together.

As so many problems are a result of a lack of self confidence (notably over-eating, anxiety, stress and nervousness), in hypnotherapy, confidence boosting is something that needs to be worked on first of all.

Hypnotherapy helps to boost self confidence as it gets past the 'gatekeeper' and into the subconscious mind to put an end to, or change the negative way in which the person talks to themselves. Hypnotherapy helps to remove any negative beliefs which can hinder spiritual and mental growth so that they can finally accept themselves and exude the confidence that was always there anyway.